When Nothing Fits

Cinderella got her happy ending when she tried on the shoe. To be honest, I only have few pairs of shoes that fit me now. I am 3 months post pregnancy. However, nothing seems to change. It is frustrating & infuriating to rummage through my clothes, try on a few pieces and find nothing that will fit. My body has deteriorated. I am an ugly, fat, old woman.

But you know what fits me now? She does. Her name is Ulyana Maxine. Her fingers fit perfectly into my palm. She snuggles just fine against my body. And when I carry her, she fits just right in my arms.  I felt that I was built just for her. 

My shoes do not fit me, but I still have my happy and perfect ending in Ulyana. She is worth all these struggles. My fears vanish when I look at her. I know that no matter what will happen, I will be loved. Loved by her. And I love her just the same and more.

Merry Christmas my dear Ulyana. You make mommy so happy everyday.